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08 August 2009 @ 12:55 am
Title: Q & A Kindergarten Style
Authour: maroonladybug
Pairing: There isn't one :D
Rating: PG
A/N: Let’s pretend, for the sake of not making Bones and Scotty look like they failed Kindergarten, that everyone is the same age and live in the same place, be that on a ship, the moon or wherever. Written for the Star Trek XI Kink Meme prompt found here.


"Normally, children have a mommy and a daddy, or a grandmother and a grandfather that they live with if --," the teacher sitting at the front of the class with a picture book in her hand and an irritated wrinkle creasing her forehead sighed quietly as James Kirk, her most excitable student, nearly knocked the little girl next to him over with the flailing of his raised hand. " Yes, James?"

"I have a daddy and a papa, Miss Jones, is that normal too?"

Miss Jones sighed again and then rolled her eyes, "Of course, James. If you'd been listening quietly like the rest of the class you would have heard me mention that next."

Hikaru Sulu snickered quietly next to James, causing a blush to creep up the boy's cheeks, as Miss Jones turned back towards the book.


Later on, a short while after nap time had begun and Leonard had grown tired of watching the new student -- a tiny Russian boy by the name of Pavel that was only two years old and something Miss Jones kept calling a genius -- snore almost silently next to his mat he grew curios and rolled over to face his bestest friend.


The other boy didn't stir beneath his blanket (the cool one with a Starship on it and 'JAMES T. KIRK' written on the corner in permanent marker) and so Leonard tried poking him in the shoulder with a chubby finger, "Jim?"


Jim yawned widely and then blinked at Leonard with sleepy eyes, his hands fisting in his blanket, “Nap time is over already?”

Leonard shook his head, “Nope,” and then asked the question he hadn’t gotten to after story time. “Do you really not have a mommy?”

Jim thought hard for a minute, “My daddy and my papa have a friend who had me but she isn’t my mommy.”

“Who tucks you in then and reads you bedtime stories and checks under your bed for Romulans?” Leonard asked.

“ My papa reads me stories when daddy is in space and then my daddy reads me stories and tucks me into bed when papa is in space.” Jim shut his droopy eyes and then continued, “I like when papa reads me stories more though ‘cuz he does all the voices of the peoples in the books properly, even if daddy does give better bedtime hugs.”

Leonard nodded, his own eyes drifting shut just as Miss Jones made her way over to the corner where the two boys had curled into each other.


At snack time it was Nyota who asked the next question, “ James, who makes your lunch?”

Jim smiled until his eyes turned all squinty at the corners, “ My daddy does! papa’s sandwiches don’t ever have enough stuff in them and daddy banded him from the kitchen the last time he was home. It was really funny.”

Scotty shoved his whole graham cracker into his mouth, chewed and then spluttered half of it into Spock’s hair, much to the visiting Vulcan’s disgust, “Who takes you to the doctor when you get sick then? My mommy takes me and gives me kisses when I have to get a hypo-thingie and I cry.”

“My papa always takes me,” Jim shrugged. “He says it’s ‘cuz my daddy has a weak constipation.”

“I believe the word you are looking for is ‘constitution’.” Spock brushed the remainder of Scotty’s snack from his hair and then nibbled the corner of his own cracker, “My mother always tells my father that he’s constipated because he doesn’t eat enough fruit.”

Leonard nodded wisely at Spock, “My mommy tells my daddy the same thing.”

Jim laughed loudly at that, attracting the attention of Miss Jones who came over and ushered everyone outside and onto the playground where Jim was asked one last question by a really shy Orion named Gaila, her red bangs and skirt alike flopping towards the ground as they hung upside down on the monkey bars, “Why do you have two daddy’s? ”

“Because they love each other, silly,” Jim flipped over and stood looking up at Gaila as if she was crazy. ” Even though they get on each other’s nerves and my papa is younger than my daddy and they argue over who has to bathe me, they always kiss when they don’t think I can see them and daddy showed me this bottle of smelly stuff that he says he wears just because my papa likes it and they’re always really happy to see each other after one of them comes back from a long trip and my papa says that if someone ever makes fun of me for it that I should punch them in the nose.”

Gaila wiggled her way off the bars and onto the mulch to stand right next to Jim, her hands on her hips and her voice loud, “I only wanted to know because I don’t have a daddy, only a mommy and a mama.”

Jim looked shocked and then, after a moment asked, “But who tucks you in at night?”

Tags: ,
Black Crystall Draygon: ST - Chekov gleeface!b_c_draygon on August 9th, 2009 06:55 pm (UTC)
This is about a million different kinds of adorable! I love it!

The questions the others ask are just perfect. Checking under the bed for Romulans made me giggle! And Jim's daddy having a weak 'constipation' (and Spock's response to that). *gleeful*

The unexpected!Gaila-with-two-mothers at the end, though - that made the entire fic, for me. That, and the fact that Jim finds that just as weird as everybody else finds his parents.

Basically, <3 This fic put a massive smile on my face, and is definitely going in my memories. Thank you!
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on August 10th, 2009 08:40 am (UTC)

I'm glad you enjoyed it so much ♥

It's nice to know that my first fic in this fandom was good enough to earn a spot in someone's memories *g*
gascansandmatchgascansandmatch on August 13th, 2009 01:14 am (UTC)
Omg I think this is the cutest thing I have ever read in a long time.
Something like this would make for an amazing short film. You are a really good writer and I hope you know that.♥
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on August 13th, 2009 02:17 am (UTC)
Aww you're so sweet :)

I'm glad you liked it ♥
near_familynear_family on August 23rd, 2009 06:19 am (UTC)
That was full of serious adorableness. Also I loved the way they talked, I think that's totally how the crew would sound if they were little and in Pre-school/Daycare together.
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on October 16th, 2009 02:48 am (UTC)
Aww, thank you! I've got a sister in Kindergarden so I tried to emulate her speech patterns. I'm glad the result didn't turn out horribly :D
A.J. Alexanderjazzonia on November 29th, 2009 01:02 am (UTC)
This was so cute! You captured kids' voices really well, and the discussion was so innocent that I grinned the whole way through. I usually only read George/Chris sexytimes pre-Narada, but this was quite an enjoyable read.
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on December 2nd, 2009 08:10 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed something so out of your comfort zone :D
jaxinthebox: Star Trek: Pike is Lovejaxinthebox on November 29th, 2009 01:43 am (UTC)
OMG. That was so freaking cute!
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on December 2nd, 2009 10:02 pm (UTC)
♥ :D ♥
(Anonymous) on November 29th, 2009 03:04 am (UTC)
Would it be toooooo much to ask for you to write more in this verse?! I loved it so much!! And the Jim and Leonard cuddling just made my day!
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on December 2nd, 2009 10:07 pm (UTC)
Writing that little part about Leonard and Jim during nap time was my favourite too XD

I'd love to write more in this verse but I'm not quite sure what I'd even have the crew doing ... if you have any plot-tribbles you'd like to send my way though, feel free to request it!

once_too_many: pic#50782420once_too_many on November 29th, 2009 09:54 am (UTC)
Wonderful! The kids are all so charming and inquisitive. But, never obnoxious! You've written this so well.
This fic is so perfect. I'm torn between wanting more and loving it just the way it is!
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on December 2nd, 2009 10:02 pm (UTC)

It's hardly perfect but I appreciate the praise all the same ... thank you for reading and being so thoughtful as to comment ♥
Aventadora: Random: * Sheldon is a FANBOY *sweetphaex on December 1st, 2009 03:45 pm (UTC)

I would hug all of these kids so much their eyeballs plopp out their gigantic chibi heads XD *dies of cute*
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on December 2nd, 2009 09:59 pm (UTC)
Don't die! Who would provide me with such amusing imagery if you did?!

♥ for you~
secretthoughtsecretthought on December 1st, 2009 11:35 pm (UTC)
This was cute :)
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on December 2nd, 2009 10:00 pm (UTC)
Thank you :) On another note, your icon is all kinds of sexy ... who is he?
secretthoughtsecretthought on December 2nd, 2009 11:14 pm (UTC)
ph my gosh, Jensen Ackles from Supernatural!
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on December 3rd, 2009 03:02 am (UTC)
.... I knew you were going to say that *hangs head in shame* ... I've a friend obsessed with Misha Colins XD
secretthoughtsecretthought on December 3rd, 2009 05:25 am (UTC)
Don't they make the cutest pairing?!!! And don't worry, you'll make up for it somehow.
CӒSΣY: Wasn'thazel_belle on December 9th, 2009 11:31 pm (UTC)
Leonard nodded, his own eyes drifting shut just as Miss Jones made her way over to the corner where the two boys had curled into each other.

THIS! right there was absolutely adorable....cutest set of kids ever. and SURPRISE Gaila with two mommies, i died because of the cuteness.

ps: chibi enterprise crew are adorable in any shape and form.
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on December 24th, 2009 02:02 am (UTC)

I'm glad you enjoyed it! There is a new kid!fic in the works so keep an eye out ;)
Caitlynslashqueen15 on January 21st, 2010 04:43 am (UTC)
lmfao gaila. that was so adorable
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on February 17th, 2010 04:19 pm (UTC)
Gaila's line was one of those things that just happen in a fic and I'm glad it worked for you ♥
sts451sts451 on February 7th, 2010 07:37 am (UTC)
so fricken CUTE! <3 I'm like in love with it omg :D SOOOOO ADORABLE XD
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on February 17th, 2010 04:21 pm (UTC)
Re: Omg.....
Is this recc'd somewhere? I never expected so many people to comment on it XD

I'm happy you liked it!
(Deleted comment)
maroonladybugmaroonladybug on April 26th, 2010 02:03 am (UTC)
Aww, thank you :D

I'm quite possibly dead from the cuteness of this comment ♥